Typos are universal in published work. There are few times I have read an entire novel and not seen at least one misused comma, misspelled word ("bass" for "base," for example), etc. May Day has a couple, too. For the most part, typos are not distracting, especially if the novel is otherwise well-written, but sometimes they're funny. I just came across the following typo in an online mystery writing ezine, and it shows the power of little words ("as," in this case):
"The writing industry is often as difficult to penetrate as an emerging writer."
It makes us new writers sound like a pretty frigid lot, no? The ezine is otherwise fantastic, and I emailed them a heads up about the typo. The editor responded with this email, which made me giggle:
"I choose to blame my husband completely. He also put in a short story, when a cop was calling for paramedics after his partner was shot, 'Tell them to hurray.' Ahhh, typos."
As a college writing instructor for ten years, I've also seen some my share of student typos, like the paper calling for a ban on youth in Asia in hospitals, and the essay saying we needed to stop taking our rights for granite. Technically, those may be biffos and not typos because they weren't accidental. This is a good time to plug reading. Reading makes people smart.
Tuesday, February 28, 2006
Saturday, February 25, 2006
Guest DJ
I'm going to be a guest DJ on the March 17th (St. Patrick's Day!) 9:00 am morning show on Alexandria's very own Z99, 80s, 90s, and today! My good friend Kellie will be joining me, so it should be a good time. I'm going to be spinning it old school, dig? A little Hall and Oates, maybe some Men at Work, a dash of Little River Band, a hair of Crystal Gale, and stir it all up with a Rod Stewart spoon. Ha! I hope that no one at the radio station reads my blog or they will totally rescind their offer. Anyhow, I'm pretty sure I just sit there and laugh at everything the DJ says. I'm going to try and give away free signed copies of May Day, so tune in if you're in the listening area!
Friday, February 24, 2006
Fictography
Fictography is a new literary term I stumbled across, and as near as I can tell, it's a fictionalized biography. There's also an auto fictography, which means you wrote it yourself but makes it sound like you do TOO many things by yourself, so I'd just stick with fictography. I imagine an author would choose to write a fictography instead of a memoir when they wanted to sensationalize their life stories. That's what James Frey did, apparently, and if he'd just called it fictography instead of memoir, he would have sold a bazillion less copies and gotten to stay out of Oprah's spanking machine.
An author would also want to write a fictography if she wanted to promise her reader the edginess of memoir but still be able to hide behind the veil of fiction if her life story was too edgy. Another literary term for that genre might be the chickenshitography. I'm writing one now, and I've got about sixty pages. It's tentatively titled Free as a Ghost and is about a woman's experiences after her husband commits suicide. It's tabled as I edit June Bug and write Knee High by July, but I keep going back to it. Watch for me hawking my chickenshitography in about three years.
An author would also want to write a fictography if she wanted to promise her reader the edginess of memoir but still be able to hide behind the veil of fiction if her life story was too edgy. Another literary term for that genre might be the chickenshitography. I'm writing one now, and I've got about sixty pages. It's tentatively titled Free as a Ghost and is about a woman's experiences after her husband commits suicide. It's tabled as I edit June Bug and write Knee High by July, but I keep going back to it. Watch for me hawking my chickenshitography in about three years.
Thursday, February 23, 2006
Tax Tips for Writers
I am not an accountant, and I'm just barely a writer, but I attended an informative presentation on this topic at Love Is Murder, I just met with my accountant, and I'm plagiarizing freely from the very good article called Writers and Taxes from the most recent A View from the Loft. Take my suggestions as just that.
Pre-published Writers
The best tax advice I ever got was to keep track of every penny I spent establishing my writing career, from paper I printed rough drafts on to postage on query letters to receipts for the Nut Goodies I sent with them. Because of my detailed record-keeping, I was able to write all this off at the end of the year, which I did for the three years it took me to get published. I encourage you to make a "receipts and notes" folder in a drawer or filing cabinet, or stuff them in a dedicated manila envelope that you will not lose.
I also devoted a portion of my house (a whole room, actually) to writing. In this room is my computer, a bazillion ripped pieces of paper with story ideas scribbled on them (Sandra Cisneros calls these "buttons," and you sew a story around them), pens, darts to chew on (I'm orally fixated and quit smoking a decade ago), and books I use for research. Because this is a space devoted to my business of writing, I get to write off a portion of all my utilities. Other points a writer (prepublished or published) should consider:
Pre-published Writers
The best tax advice I ever got was to keep track of every penny I spent establishing my writing career, from paper I printed rough drafts on to postage on query letters to receipts for the Nut Goodies I sent with them. Because of my detailed record-keeping, I was able to write all this off at the end of the year, which I did for the three years it took me to get published. I encourage you to make a "receipts and notes" folder in a drawer or filing cabinet, or stuff them in a dedicated manila envelope that you will not lose.
I also devoted a portion of my house (a whole room, actually) to writing. In this room is my computer, a bazillion ripped pieces of paper with story ideas scribbled on them (Sandra Cisneros calls these "buttons," and you sew a story around them), pens, darts to chew on (I'm orally fixated and quit smoking a decade ago), and books I use for research. Because this is a space devoted to my business of writing, I get to write off a portion of all my utilities. Other points a writer (prepublished or published) should consider:
- Your writing must be a business (you intend to make money off of it) and not a hobby (you do it for personal fulfillment and make occasional money off of it) for losses to be deductible. If your writing is a business, keep detailed records and have a clear and honest plan for turning a profit.
- Mileage. The standard mileage rate for 2005 is 40.5 cents per mile until September 1; it's 48.5 cents per mile for the rest of the year, and 44.5 cents per mile for 2006.
- IRA. For 2005, you could contribute up to $4000 to an IRA.
- Withholding. If it looks like you're going to have to pay big for 2005, now is the time to increase your withholding for 2006.
Published Writers
Now that I actually have a published book, I have a lot more money going in and out and so have set aside a three-ring binder to record my expenses (review copies sent out, the postage I paid to send them, promotional materials I bought, etc.) and income (royalties, books sold by me at booksignings). I also need to collect sales tax when I sell books myself, so I need to keep track of that and file a Minnesota sales tax form at the end of the year. It appears to be a very quick and straightforward form for the amount of sales tax I'll be collecting.
My accountant also recommended I look into filing to become an LLC, which stands for Limited Liability Company. Basically, I'd be a company of one, but having LLC status would protect me legally from debtors or people who would want to sue me on behalf of my writing. Sounds kind of paranoid--I write fictional mysteries, what's to sue about?--but it also sounds smart. The only cost is the filing fee in your state, and you do your taxes basically the same way, writing off expenses with a schedule C. I'm thinking of calling Brad Begley, an attorney and CPA who works with writers and artists, to get more info. His number is 612.333.7530. If you're not from Minnesota and have more questions about tax filing for writers, I encourage you to look for a CPA/attorney in your area who specializes in entertainment. Best of luck.
The Big Picture
I just received the following alarming article, South Dakota Passes Abortion Ban. Depending on your personal sensibilities, you will get different information from this article, but the one clear message is the value placed on grown, childbearing women and the role of the common voter in deciding how the country is run, as evidenced by this paragraph from the article:
"Proposed amendments to the law to create exceptions to specifically protect the health of the mother, or in cases of rape or incest, were voted down. Also defeated was an amendment to put the proposal in the hands of voters."
For those unsure how this all turns out if unchecked, I encourage you to read Margaret Atwood's brilliant and underappreciated social criticism, The Handmaid's Tale. I do find hope in the promise of the Congressional Progressive Caucus. It's time to engage.
"Proposed amendments to the law to create exceptions to specifically protect the health of the mother, or in cases of rape or incest, were voted down. Also defeated was an amendment to put the proposal in the hands of voters."
For those unsure how this all turns out if unchecked, I encourage you to read Margaret Atwood's brilliant and underappreciated social criticism, The Handmaid's Tale. I do find hope in the promise of the Congressional Progressive Caucus. It's time to engage.
Wednesday, February 22, 2006
Voice
What makes a novel entertaining? I'm going to argue tonight that it's Voice, with a capital "V." The structure of a novel, for example a mystery, can be mapped out in a general scientific fashion--main mystery (usually murder) occurs early on, protagonist tries to solve it, red herrings flop out and back, and the mystery is laid bare in the end. Setting and character development skills can be read about, practiced, and learned. Voice, though, I think is the real deal. A unique voice, one I can hear, is what keeps me coming back to an author. I'm attracted to humor, but also to vulnerability, honesty, and insight. Here's an example of a compelling chicklit voice in an email I just received from a friend:
"I really think people like Marsha Brady (do realize she is not real) ruined things a bit for us real-life girls. I thought guys just lined up (of course only the BMOC's) to take girls out, and that our biggest problem would be choosing a good outfit and not booking two dates in the same night.
Boy, I sometimes feel like saying, 'life, I'm waiting start any time.' So, imagine what it may/will be like to have him make you breakfast, paint your toenails, carry you over a puddle, and scrub your back in a huge tub full of bubbles (you of course have had the perfect bikini wax and can relax in the tub). These are some of the best moments in a relationship, the ones that happen before the relationship does. To quote a great ketchup commercial...'anticipation.'"
Don't you want to know what she was writing about, specifically? Don't you want to find out more about all the people involved? I do, and it's because she's got great voice. And voice isn't just about word choice, it's about selection of details and focus. For a compelling example of that, read Holly Hassel's brilliant poem, Cool as [Miami V]Ice:
A bongo-studded soundtrack Hammers,
percussing the primitive, sun-soaked world and
propelling it into American hearts
that multiethnic jewel in sunny South Beach.
It’s 1984
the camera roves over Miami’s
purest and dirtiest corners,
bubbling ice blue waters,
bouncing bikinied cleavage,
jai alai tournaments,
the grubby shaded jawline of Don Johnson,
and Armani-clad Philip Michael Thomas,
Crockett tanned, rugged, wounded,
Viewers walk in his sockless loafers,
so just so with a crewneck and blazer—
blithesome and (dare)devil-may-care,
the pastel linen camouflages
his lost, tortured, persistent spirit;
the ferocious pursuit of justice
nags his conscience like a nip
from Elvis, the captive gator….
a justice pursued relentlessly and swiftly
as his St. Vitus Dance speedboat,
site of sin as flush with rush
as his black Testarossa
America shivers.
Tubbs, New York transplant,
driven by vengeance,
dapper and debonair as a
top hat, as likely to spin French
phrasing as to brandish a beretta.
Ah, Tubbs, whose worldliness is lost
on Switek, Zito, Castillo, et al,
always voted most likely to
go undercover as a Caribbean vagrant.
stylish, edgy, lambent, a world of mint green
and strawberry ice cream pink,
where blow and weed
guns and girls,
whores and horrors
[pre]occupy our slick heroes
mired in the dark—no, darkest--corners
of huMannity
America swoons in 1984.
Jump cut dumb luck drug bust
Crockett and Tubbs
muck through
angel dust, lucre lust
and zoom lens
Mercedes Benz
Voodoo guru
ocean blue,
prostitute
ocean side
car ride
a cardiac soundtrack
Miami Vice
Zeitgeist.
1984.
There's few poems I really like because many of them are vaguely embarassing to read--too private with too much straining, like you walked in on someone pooping--or the author is trying to obfuscate instead of illuminate. Cool as [Miami V]Ice, though, has voice and verve and brings me into the moment while engaging in pop culture criticism and irony. The humor certainly doesn't hurt. Gotta love that Voice.
"I really think people like Marsha Brady (do realize she is not real) ruined things a bit for us real-life girls. I thought guys just lined up (of course only the BMOC's) to take girls out, and that our biggest problem would be choosing a good outfit and not booking two dates in the same night.
Boy, I sometimes feel like saying, 'life, I'm waiting start any time.' So, imagine what it may/will be like to have him make you breakfast, paint your toenails, carry you over a puddle, and scrub your back in a huge tub full of bubbles (you of course have had the perfect bikini wax and can relax in the tub). These are some of the best moments in a relationship, the ones that happen before the relationship does. To quote a great ketchup commercial...'anticipation.'"
Don't you want to know what she was writing about, specifically? Don't you want to find out more about all the people involved? I do, and it's because she's got great voice. And voice isn't just about word choice, it's about selection of details and focus. For a compelling example of that, read Holly Hassel's brilliant poem, Cool as [Miami V]Ice:
A bongo-studded soundtrack Hammers,
percussing the primitive, sun-soaked world and
propelling it into American hearts
that multiethnic jewel in sunny South Beach.
It’s 1984
the camera roves over Miami’s
purest and dirtiest corners,
bubbling ice blue waters,
bouncing bikinied cleavage,
jai alai tournaments,
the grubby shaded jawline of Don Johnson,
and Armani-clad Philip Michael Thomas,
Crockett tanned, rugged, wounded,
Viewers walk in his sockless loafers,
so just so with a crewneck and blazer—
blithesome and (dare)devil-may-care,
the pastel linen camouflages
his lost, tortured, persistent spirit;
the ferocious pursuit of justice
nags his conscience like a nip
from Elvis, the captive gator….
a justice pursued relentlessly and swiftly
as his St. Vitus Dance speedboat,
site of sin as flush with rush
as his black Testarossa
America shivers.
Tubbs, New York transplant,
driven by vengeance,
dapper and debonair as a
top hat, as likely to spin French
phrasing as to brandish a beretta.
Ah, Tubbs, whose worldliness is lost
on Switek, Zito, Castillo, et al,
always voted most likely to
go undercover as a Caribbean vagrant.
stylish, edgy, lambent, a world of mint green
and strawberry ice cream pink,
where blow and weed
guns and girls,
whores and horrors
[pre]occupy our slick heroes
mired in the dark—no, darkest--corners
of huMannity
America swoons in 1984.
Jump cut dumb luck drug bust
Crockett and Tubbs
muck through
angel dust, lucre lust
and zoom lens
Mercedes Benz
Voodoo guru
ocean blue,
prostitute
ocean side
car ride
a cardiac soundtrack
Miami Vice
Zeitgeist.
1984.
There's few poems I really like because many of them are vaguely embarassing to read--too private with too much straining, like you walked in on someone pooping--or the author is trying to obfuscate instead of illuminate. Cool as [Miami V]Ice, though, has voice and verve and brings me into the moment while engaging in pop culture criticism and irony. The humor certainly doesn't hurt. Gotta love that Voice.
Donations to the New Orleans Public Library
The New Orleans Public Library is asking for any and all hardcover and paperback books for people of all ages in an effort to restock the shelves after Katrina. The staff will assess which titles will be designated for its collections. The rest will be distributed to destitute families or sold for library fundraising. Please send your books to:
Rica A. Trigs, Public Relations
New Orleans Public Library
219 Loyola Avenue
New Orleans, LA 70112
If you tell the post office that they are for the library in New Orleans, they will give you the library rate which is slightly less than the book rate. Here's a great opportunity to support libraries, and support the readers of New Orleans!
Rica A. Trigs, Public Relations
New Orleans Public Library
219 Loyola Avenue
New Orleans, LA 70112
If you tell the post office that they are for the library in New Orleans, they will give you the library rate which is slightly less than the book rate. Here's a great opportunity to support libraries, and support the readers of New Orleans!
Tom Cruise Is the Best Monkey and Publishing Insight
If we were all monkeys, Tom Cruise would win Best Monkey every year, wouldn't he? The bummer for Tom is that we're not monkeys. I feel bad for him that way. Speaking of evolution and why Tom isn't on board, I was reading more about the theory of intelligent design today, and I wonder what proponents think about the world of online dating, which seems like a hypothesis-crusher if there ever was one. Check out these matches in the Alexandria area (and I do this for research and not for love--I gave up online dating last year because I truly believe, as I wrote in May Day, that men and leather pants should NEVER be shopped for online, and that personal theory has nothing to do with the crop of post-operative transsexuals, acne-ridden adolescents, and sexually confused men who ended up across the table from me):
WhiteyBlue69
My favorite thing to eat is barbeque ribs. My color is purple. When it's raining out I like to work on my crafts, sit and cuddle watching a movie with the special person in my life. I love music & reading the newspaper. I Like to go bike riding. I love to eat at Famous Daves Barbeque or even a nice romantic restaurant.
OK, I'm gonna give him the benefit of the doubt and assume the "69" refers to the year he was born and is not a crude sexual promise of beautiful things to come, and I'm even going to ignore the "See Dick run" construction of his sentences. What I can't escape are the double references to his love of smoked meat and the use of "cuddle," and "special person" in the same paragraph.
Duckfiend
i like all wild game, seafood, pizza and a good steak. i'll watch anything that is funny, south park, chappelles show, old sitcoms.scary movies.i listen to music alot, e-bay, nap, my dog, and of course duck hunting. I WANT TO MEET A WOMAN WHO IS NON-JUDGEMENTAL OF OTHERS, NOT A GOLD-DIGGER, HAPPY WITH HER LOOKS AND BODY AND A CUTE SMILE.MUST BE WICKEDLY SEXY AND NAUGHTY. NO FATTIES. HOPEFULLY SHE LIKES TO FISH AND AT LEAST NOT BE AGAINST HUNTING.THE MALL ISNT ONE OF MY FAVORITE PLACES, I'D RATHER GO TO THE GROCERY STORE. SOMEONE WHO LOVES ANIMALS, ESPECIALLY DOGS.DONT WANT A HEALTH NUT OR VEGETARIAN. SOMEONE WHO LIKES TO GIVE AND GET A MASSAGE.
I'm guessing that the only handle worse than "Duckfiend"--FreeMustacheRides--was already taken. But what I'm getting from this is that I have to be slender, not care that he's fat, and hang out at home watching the dogs and waiting to be wickedly sexy and naughty as soon as he gets off the duck blind, reeking of elk urine and Schlitz lite. Have I already sufficiently horrified you with my dating prospects in Alexandria, or do you want one more?
BestKisser1
Have youever seen stars after a kiss I can make it happen. I like doing all kinds of outdoor activities like fishing, camping, hiking , sitting around a campfire, Ilike to cook for someone special like to cuddle on the coach and watch movies with the fireplace going and have some hot popcorn (I like to surprise the one Iam with flowers, little notes a hug or a kiss when they are not expecting it like to have candles lit in the house makes for a romantic setting I like to run a hot bath for that special person and have candles lined along the tub I also give very good back rubs. I like to watch football sometimes
You can see
someone tried to help this guy--tell them you like to cuddle and bring flowers!!--but he has his own idea of what women like, as you can see from his posted picture. And who am I to say he's wrong? There are surely women out there who like a simple man who can provide, as well as decorate their double-wide with dead animal parts whilst running them a bath in the rust-stained tub. My point is that Duckfiend, WhiteyBlue69, and BestKisser1 are all you get on the Alexandria buffet of love. As a liberal, feminist, semi-vegetarian, single, educated female who likes to read, write, and talk about politics and culture, it's a pretty grim scene. I'm not whining. I'm giving you a feel for the angst from which I write. I am truly suffering. On to my next topic.
WhiteyBlue69
My favorite thing to eat is barbeque ribs. My color is purple. When it's raining out I like to work on my crafts, sit and cuddle watching a movie with the special person in my life. I love music & reading the newspaper. I Like to go bike riding. I love to eat at Famous Daves Barbeque or even a nice romantic restaurant.
OK, I'm gonna give him the benefit of the doubt and assume the "69" refers to the year he was born and is not a crude sexual promise of beautiful things to come, and I'm even going to ignore the "See Dick run" construction of his sentences. What I can't escape are the double references to his love of smoked meat and the use of "cuddle," and "special person" in the same paragraph.
Duckfiend
i like all wild game, seafood, pizza and a good steak. i'll watch anything that is funny, south park, chappelles show, old sitcoms.scary movies.i listen to music alot, e-bay, nap, my dog, and of course duck hunting. I WANT TO MEET A WOMAN WHO IS NON-JUDGEMENTAL OF OTHERS, NOT A GOLD-DIGGER, HAPPY WITH HER LOOKS AND BODY AND A CUTE SMILE.MUST BE WICKEDLY SEXY AND NAUGHTY. NO FATTIES. HOPEFULLY SHE LIKES TO FISH AND AT LEAST NOT BE AGAINST HUNTING.THE MALL ISNT ONE OF MY FAVORITE PLACES, I'D RATHER GO TO THE GROCERY STORE. SOMEONE WHO LOVES ANIMALS, ESPECIALLY DOGS.DONT WANT A HEALTH NUT OR VEGETARIAN. SOMEONE WHO LIKES TO GIVE AND GET A MASSAGE.
I'm guessing that the only handle worse than "Duckfiend"--FreeMustacheRides--was already taken. But what I'm getting from this is that I have to be slender, not care that he's fat, and hang out at home watching the dogs and waiting to be wickedly sexy and naughty as soon as he gets off the duck blind, reeking of elk urine and Schlitz lite. Have I already sufficiently horrified you with my dating prospects in Alexandria, or do you want one more?
BestKisser1
Have youever seen stars after a kiss I can make it happen. I like doing all kinds of outdoor activities like fishing, camping, hiking , sitting around a campfire, Ilike to cook for someone special like to cuddle on the coach and watch movies with the fireplace going and have some hot popcorn (I like to surprise the one Iam with flowers, little notes a hug or a kiss when they are not expecting it like to have candles lit in the house makes for a romantic setting I like to run a hot bath for that special person and have candles lined along the tub I also give very good back rubs. I like to watch football sometimes
You can see
someone tried to help this guy--tell them you like to cuddle and bring flowers!!--but he has his own idea of what women like, as you can see from his posted picture. And who am I to say he's wrong? There are surely women out there who like a simple man who can provide, as well as decorate their double-wide with dead animal parts whilst running them a bath in the rust-stained tub. My point is that Duckfiend, WhiteyBlue69, and BestKisser1 are all you get on the Alexandria buffet of love. As a liberal, feminist, semi-vegetarian, single, educated female who likes to read, write, and talk about politics and culture, it's a pretty grim scene. I'm not whining. I'm giving you a feel for the angst from which I write. I am truly suffering. On to my next topic.
How to Get Published
I'm enjoying many aspects of being a published writer--meeting new people, crossing paths with famous authors, getting interviewed by cute newspaper editors--and I want to funnel that experience and knowledge into my teaching. Specifically, I teach an online Creative Writing course every fall at Alexandria Technical College, and I've never been able to find a textbook that includes a "How to Get Published" component, so I'm going to make one and incorporate it into the curriculum. All you lurkers out there, if you have any publishing knowledge to share, please do so now (concrete stuff like "check out literary marketplace," "get an agent/don't get an agent," "join a writer's group and here's how to find one," etc.). Your brains and ideas are appreciated! Oh, and a grand total of zero people have posted their favorite authors (who they are, what they wrote, why they rock) to this blog, so those fantabulous May Day magnets are gathering dust. Don't let this opportunity pass you by! Post and win!
p.s. For the record, I know for a fact that there are many wonderful people doing online dating, and a close friend of mine met her absolutely fantastic husband that way, so it's not nearly all bad. It just seems as though online dating is the last refuge of the scoundrel. And monkeys.
Thursday, February 16, 2006
What Is Chick-Lit? and Somebody Out There Likes You
May Day is a chick-lit mystery, but what exactly IS chick-lit? It's good stuff. It's entertainment. It's humor. It's strong female protagonists. Check out the Electronic Book Review for more information.
Now that we've cleared that up, what is the difference between memoir and autobiography? (no James Frey jokes.) Mike Jacobson, editor of the Paynesville Press, and I got into that conversation. I said that memoirs are what nobodies write, and autobiographies are for famous people. Mike said he didn't think there was much of a difference. Turn's out we were both wrong, according to Writer's Digest:
"It's true that in some general contexts, memoir and autobiography can be used interchangeably. However, when publishing houses note a difference, they're making the following distinction: autobiography focuses on the writer's entire life, whereas memoir focuses on a certain aspect of it."
And finally, remember that someone out there loves ya'. Oh, it's not me. But someone. Go here and type your name in the pop-up box to find out who. Whom. Who.
Now that we've cleared that up, what is the difference between memoir and autobiography? (no James Frey jokes.) Mike Jacobson, editor of the Paynesville Press, and I got into that conversation. I said that memoirs are what nobodies write, and autobiographies are for famous people. Mike said he didn't think there was much of a difference. Turn's out we were both wrong, according to Writer's Digest:
"It's true that in some general contexts, memoir and autobiography can be used interchangeably. However, when publishing houses note a difference, they're making the following distinction: autobiography focuses on the writer's entire life, whereas memoir focuses on a certain aspect of it."
And finally, remember that someone out there loves ya'. Oh, it's not me. But someone. Go here and type your name in the pop-up box to find out who. Whom. Who.
Monday, February 13, 2006
How to Get Published
I made a new friend today named Jo Colvin. She is a witty and clever journalist at the Echo Press in Alexandria, and she interviewed me for an article on May Day to run March 10th. I hope she's good at separating the wheat from the chaff (i.e. making me sound smart). It was a good time. Jo and I decided three things:
1. It's hard to be a single woman in rural Minnesota. If a guy is upright and has pants on, he can get a date. The prospects are not so good for the single woman.
2. I look like the chick from Becker (the TV show starring sunken-eyed 1980s hunk Ted Danson). I've heard that before, and it supports my theory that we are all merely clones for famous people, who will harvest our faces and livers when they get all leathery. In an ironic twist, the famous person who will be enjoying the benefits of my spleen in 50 years was also in the movie The Island, which had a similar plot line. Doodle-eee-oooh. Who is your famous doppleganger?
3. Everyone wants to know how to get published. I actually teach an online Creative Writing course every fall at Alex Tech, so sign up to get started on being part of a writing group and to learn (and practice) the rudiments of stepping into the publishing world. It's not magic, getting published--you write the best work you can write, you get a writer's circle to give you feedback, you edit, you hire a professional editor to give you feedback, you edit, you write your query letter and edit it (making sure to use marketing language) and shop it around to agents and small publishers you find by going to Preditors and Editors, Literary Marketplace (your local library should have a subscription), the AAR, and by looking who publishes the books you like/you write like (look in the acknowledgements section of any book that is similar to your style to find out who their agent was), and then you get prepared for a lot of rejection but you never give up. Easy squeezy. For the record, I was rejected over 300 times, and look at me now? I have a thermos, a chair, and a computer. Dreams really do come true.
1. It's hard to be a single woman in rural Minnesota. If a guy is upright and has pants on, he can get a date. The prospects are not so good for the single woman.
2. I look like the chick from Becker (the TV show starring sunken-eyed 1980s hunk Ted Danson). I've heard that before, and it supports my theory that we are all merely clones for famous people, who will harvest our faces and livers when they get all leathery. In an ironic twist, the famous person who will be enjoying the benefits of my spleen in 50 years was also in the movie The Island, which had a similar plot line. Doodle-eee-oooh. Who is your famous doppleganger?
3. Everyone wants to know how to get published. I actually teach an online Creative Writing course every fall at Alex Tech, so sign up to get started on being part of a writing group and to learn (and practice) the rudiments of stepping into the publishing world. It's not magic, getting published--you write the best work you can write, you get a writer's circle to give you feedback, you edit, you hire a professional editor to give you feedback, you edit, you write your query letter and edit it (making sure to use marketing language) and shop it around to agents and small publishers you find by going to Preditors and Editors, Literary Marketplace (your local library should have a subscription), the AAR, and by looking who publishes the books you like/you write like (look in the acknowledgements section of any book that is similar to your style to find out who their agent was), and then you get prepared for a lot of rejection but you never give up. Easy squeezy. For the record, I was rejected over 300 times, and look at me now? I have a thermos, a chair, and a computer. Dreams really do come true.
Hope she doesn't mind that I stretched out her future stomach.
Spammar
Mr. B. just sent me this great "Proper Spam Grammar" link. It appeals to the English teacher in me, but, like most everything I enjoy, is not for the humorless or puritanical.
The Elements of Spam
*Note the play on Strunk & White's famous title, or don't, if you're not a geek like me.
The Elements of Spam
*Note the play on Strunk & White's famous title, or don't, if you're not a geek like me.
Sunday, February 12, 2006
Favorite Authors and Fun Contests
Hello, one and all! I am happy to report that I am back in the day. I spent last week Thursday thinking it was tomorrow (Monday) and Friday thinking it was Tuesday (this coming Tuesday, not last Tuesday). Surprisingly little damage was done except that I harassed my brilliant web designer, Jed Johnson, for not getting the new librarian contest added to my website, which he had said he'd get to over the the weekend. Thinking the weekend had come and gone, I applied a little pressure. Pretty sure I'm in the honeymoon stage of crazy.
Actually, I think I'm just overscheduling the heck out of myself. I have a tendency to do that anyhow, but with this burgeoning writing career, I'm taking it too far. How many of you writers out there didn't know that writing is only a teeny tiny small part of being a published writer? The level of marketing required is awesome, in a "Oh my god is that a spaceship from an attacking planet blocking out the sun?" kind of way. Even with a savvy and efficient Mr. B. on my team, I still find myself constantly wondering what else I should do--blog more? Send out more review copies of May Day? Which conferences can I afford to go to? How many listservs can I join? I'm going to get all J.D. Salinger pretty soon. If anyone out there has recommendations on time management or realisitic new author marketing, I'll take 'em.
In the meanwhile, I have two happy additions to announce to my blog/website:
1. A librarian's contest. You'll find the link on my home page, but only click it if you're a librarian. Like all authors, I love the library and by natural extension, love librarians. That's one of the reasons Mira James, the protagonist in May Day, finds herself taking over the reins of the Battle Lake Public Library, as grossly underskilled as she is for the position. I wanted to spend more time in a library, and if I had to create a fictional one to do it, so be it. Back to the contest--all librarians who fill out the form will be automatically entered in the drawing to receive one free, signed copy of May Day for their library. I'll hold one drawing a month for the next six months. It's my small way of saying thank you to all the librarians and libraries who make books, the great equalizers, available to everyone.
2. A reader's contest. The first ten readers of this blog who post a comment and talk about their favorite mystery novels/authors will receive an official Murder by Month magnetic calendar sent, free of charge, to their home. Make sure to leave your email address so I can get your snail mail address to send this spectacular prize to! Everyone is invited to post, even Anastasia Beaverhausen.
Let me get the talk of favorite novels/authors started. Those of you who read my blog know I'm a fan of Krueger, Evanovich, Hiaasen, and Grafton, but I'd like to add Ellen Hart to that list. I just started reading Immaculate Midnight, the eighth (I think?) in her Jane Lawless series, and I'm happy to say I'm addicted. Her character development is fabulous, she has these great insights about human nature ("Humans are a soft fruit," is my favorite line so far), and her pacing is very strong. I'm trying to draw the book out because I know it's one of those that I'll be disappointed is done. Ever do that? Feel sort of like you're breaking up with someone when a really good book you're reading is over? Or is it just sad, pitiful, me...
Oh, and on a related note.... I'm the official Valentine's Day Grinch. I encourage one and all to not give in to the heterosexist consumerism of the holiday and instead, tell your friends and colleagues that you appreciate them. Watch for me to do a 180 on that attitude if and when I get a boyfriend again, but in the meantime, bah humbug on Valentine's Day. Blah. Grumble. Fist shaking. Who would be the un-cupid? Hmmm. How about a self-scratching, toe skin-eating, inappropriate joke-making, naked lady air freshener-having, red meat-savoring car salesman named Dean. That's me on Valentine's Day. I'm Dean. Happy Dean's Day.
Actually, I think I'm just overscheduling the heck out of myself. I have a tendency to do that anyhow, but with this burgeoning writing career, I'm taking it too far. How many of you writers out there didn't know that writing is only a teeny tiny small part of being a published writer? The level of marketing required is awesome, in a "Oh my god is that a spaceship from an attacking planet blocking out the sun?" kind of way. Even with a savvy and efficient Mr. B. on my team, I still find myself constantly wondering what else I should do--blog more? Send out more review copies of May Day? Which conferences can I afford to go to? How many listservs can I join? I'm going to get all J.D. Salinger pretty soon. If anyone out there has recommendations on time management or realisitic new author marketing, I'll take 'em.
In the meanwhile, I have two happy additions to announce to my blog/website:
1. A librarian's contest. You'll find the link on my home page, but only click it if you're a librarian. Like all authors, I love the library and by natural extension, love librarians. That's one of the reasons Mira James, the protagonist in May Day, finds herself taking over the reins of the Battle Lake Public Library, as grossly underskilled as she is for the position. I wanted to spend more time in a library, and if I had to create a fictional one to do it, so be it. Back to the contest--all librarians who fill out the form will be automatically entered in the drawing to receive one free, signed copy of May Day for their library. I'll hold one drawing a month for the next six months. It's my small way of saying thank you to all the librarians and libraries who make books, the great equalizers, available to everyone.
2. A reader's contest. The first ten readers of this blog who post a comment and talk about their favorite mystery novels/authors will receive an official Murder by Month magnetic calendar sent, free of charge, to their home. Make sure to leave your email address so I can get your snail mail address to send this spectacular prize to! Everyone is invited to post, even Anastasia Beaverhausen.
Let me get the talk of favorite novels/authors started. Those of you who read my blog know I'm a fan of Krueger, Evanovich, Hiaasen, and Grafton, but I'd like to add Ellen Hart to that list. I just started reading Immaculate Midnight, the eighth (I think?) in her Jane Lawless series, and I'm happy to say I'm addicted. Her character development is fabulous, she has these great insights about human nature ("Humans are a soft fruit," is my favorite line so far), and her pacing is very strong. I'm trying to draw the book out because I know it's one of those that I'll be disappointed is done. Ever do that? Feel sort of like you're breaking up with someone when a really good book you're reading is over? Or is it just sad, pitiful, me...
Oh, and on a related note.... I'm the official Valentine's Day Grinch. I encourage one and all to not give in to the heterosexist consumerism of the holiday and instead, tell your friends and colleagues that you appreciate them. Watch for me to do a 180 on that attitude if and when I get a boyfriend again, but in the meantime, bah humbug on Valentine's Day. Blah. Grumble. Fist shaking. Who would be the un-cupid? Hmmm. How about a self-scratching, toe skin-eating, inappropriate joke-making, naked lady air freshener-having, red meat-savoring car salesman named Dean. That's me on Valentine's Day. I'm Dean. Happy Dean's Day.
Thursday, February 09, 2006
Fired by My Agent
I have made a new author biff and learned along the way that my agent is not a forgiving woman. Or I should say, my ex-agent. Here's the story:
Four years ago, after mountains of rejections and close-acceptances from agents and small publishing houses, I found an agent who'd take me. So what if her website picture had her communing with a crystal and wearing a suede fringed vest with purple leather pants? Unfortunately, she only wanted to submit to publish on demand (POD) publishers, so our relationship was short lived and ended amicably, though I imagine she was disappointed. I swung to my next agent, who submitted to the big houses and then landed me a deal with Midnight Ink, the imprint of Llewellyn Worldwide. I am forever grateful to her for this as Midnight Ink has been incredibly supportive of me on every level, from getting May Day published to publicizing it to sending plot ideas for the series. They're really truly good people.
My agent also had a contract for June Bug, which she sold to Midnight Ink a year ago. After she does that, I ask her what's up with the future of the series. She tells me that she'll never be able to sell it to any other publishing house because no one will want to take on a series started elsewhere, and that I should just plan on selling all books in the series to Midnight Ink. She encourages me to start on an unrelated book that she can shop around to other publishers based on my success at Midnight Ink.
So I started on an unrelated book that she can shop around to other publishers based on my success with Midnight Ink. And, I sold the as-yet incomplete Knee High by July manuscript to Midnight Ink myself. This is where she gets mad. Apparently, it is bad form to ever sell anything your agent doesn't get a cut on, and when she said that I should just plan on selling all the series to Midnight Ink, she meant that I should plan on writing it and she'll make the phone call to Midnight Ink for a 15% share of the royalties. I couldn't convince her that not using an agent to negotiate my Knee High contract was based entirely on her advice and that I wasn't trying to be sneaky. She terminated our professional relationship on the spot, despite my repeated and sincere apologies for not knowing the rules.
I feel bad, but it was a good learning experience, and I share it with you as a cautionary tale if you are a pre- or newly-published writer. Here's what I learned:
1. Find out the temperament of any person you hire to represent you. I recommend poking them with a stick and calling them names to see how they react. If you develop a relationship with a publisher, find out their experience with that agent.
2. Don't ever get too busy to thank the people who helped you.
3. Not all agents want what's best for you. Check out Preditors and Editors for information on who is good and who is not. You won't find anything bad about my ex-agent listed there by me as I would classify our snafu as a miscommunication issue. Some people might even perceive her "fight for every penny at any cost" attitude an asset in an agent.
4. Many agents who represent you will expect to automatically represent everything you produce. If you have different ideas, let him/her know before you enter a professional relationship. Conversely, ask him/her what their expectations are for the relationship. My agent only asked to represent the first two books in the series, but if I had asked her what her longterm plans were, we could have avoided any bad feelings.
5. Finally, if you're new to all this like I was, ask your agent a lot of questions. I was so pleased to have a "real" agent that I didn't ask as many questions as I should have at the outset.
Even though this was a good learning experience, it leaves a bad taste in my mouth. I pride myself with being open and fair in my dealings with people, and I wish I hadn't overlooked the courtesy "I don't need you for this" email to her. I'm guessing she would have ditched me anyways given the type of relationship she perceived we had, but at least then it wouldn't have had anything to do with my manners. Lesson learned.
Four years ago, after mountains of rejections and close-acceptances from agents and small publishing houses, I found an agent who'd take me. So what if her website picture had her communing with a crystal and wearing a suede fringed vest with purple leather pants? Unfortunately, she only wanted to submit to publish on demand (POD) publishers, so our relationship was short lived and ended amicably, though I imagine she was disappointed. I swung to my next agent, who submitted to the big houses and then landed me a deal with Midnight Ink, the imprint of Llewellyn Worldwide. I am forever grateful to her for this as Midnight Ink has been incredibly supportive of me on every level, from getting May Day published to publicizing it to sending plot ideas for the series. They're really truly good people.
My agent also had a contract for June Bug, which she sold to Midnight Ink a year ago. After she does that, I ask her what's up with the future of the series. She tells me that she'll never be able to sell it to any other publishing house because no one will want to take on a series started elsewhere, and that I should just plan on selling all books in the series to Midnight Ink. She encourages me to start on an unrelated book that she can shop around to other publishers based on my success at Midnight Ink.
So I started on an unrelated book that she can shop around to other publishers based on my success with Midnight Ink. And, I sold the as-yet incomplete Knee High by July manuscript to Midnight Ink myself. This is where she gets mad. Apparently, it is bad form to ever sell anything your agent doesn't get a cut on, and when she said that I should just plan on selling all the series to Midnight Ink, she meant that I should plan on writing it and she'll make the phone call to Midnight Ink for a 15% share of the royalties. I couldn't convince her that not using an agent to negotiate my Knee High contract was based entirely on her advice and that I wasn't trying to be sneaky. She terminated our professional relationship on the spot, despite my repeated and sincere apologies for not knowing the rules.
I feel bad, but it was a good learning experience, and I share it with you as a cautionary tale if you are a pre- or newly-published writer. Here's what I learned:
1. Find out the temperament of any person you hire to represent you. I recommend poking them with a stick and calling them names to see how they react. If you develop a relationship with a publisher, find out their experience with that agent.
2. Don't ever get too busy to thank the people who helped you.
3. Not all agents want what's best for you. Check out Preditors and Editors for information on who is good and who is not. You won't find anything bad about my ex-agent listed there by me as I would classify our snafu as a miscommunication issue. Some people might even perceive her "fight for every penny at any cost" attitude an asset in an agent.
4. Many agents who represent you will expect to automatically represent everything you produce. If you have different ideas, let him/her know before you enter a professional relationship. Conversely, ask him/her what their expectations are for the relationship. My agent only asked to represent the first two books in the series, but if I had asked her what her longterm plans were, we could have avoided any bad feelings.
5. Finally, if you're new to all this like I was, ask your agent a lot of questions. I was so pleased to have a "real" agent that I didn't ask as many questions as I should have at the outset.
Even though this was a good learning experience, it leaves a bad taste in my mouth. I pride myself with being open and fair in my dealings with people, and I wish I hadn't overlooked the courtesy "I don't need you for this" email to her. I'm guessing she would have ditched me anyways given the type of relationship she perceived we had, but at least then it wouldn't have had anything to do with my manners. Lesson learned.
Tuesday, February 07, 2006
A Famous Author Was Rude to Me, and Other Tales from Love Is Murder
OK, so you know what happened on Friday at the conference.
Saturday
First, I got copies of my books to the bookseller, Sue Peterson. That way, I didn't have to deal with cash when working with the droves of people anxious for a hot off the presses copy of May Day (I actually did sign and sell three copies, which was fun after I got over the "what and where do I write?" dilemma). Then, I went to various panel presentations and met a wonderful woman named Eleonora, who is working on a mystery series involving birding. It sounded like it has a built-in audience and great potential. I also met a dolphin researcher named Kelly Jaakkola writing a science thriller involving dolphins. Smart chick. And I got William Kent Krueger to sign a copy of his standalone for my mom and David Morrell to sign a copy of Creepers for my dad. Both men were very nice and both are very good writers, though seriously, if you haven't read WKK's writing, get some now. He's off the charts good.
In the afternoon I went to a panel on writing sex (which is about all I'm doing with it lately), and Barry Eisler made funny points about how authors are uncomfortable writing about sex because we all think the reader is going to think we're writing about ourselves, and what if we're bad in bed? Shortly thereafter, I was on the first time authors panel, and I was nervous but met a nice guy named Marcus. And then one time, at band camp... oh wait, here's a picture of me at the first time author's panel with Morgan Mandel on my left and Sarah Wisseman on my right.
So that night, I'm sitting by chance at a dinner table with the luminaries of the conference--famous, famous writers. I don't know how it happened. Anyhow, on my left is one of the famous authors, who shall from now on be referred to as Rudy. I have never read Rudy's work, but coincidentally bought a copy of the first book in the series the day before (not Morrell or Krueger). I say to Rudy, "I just bought a copy of blah de blah. I'm excited to read it."
Rudy, who is hilarious in large groups but currently throwing back scotch like his ass is on fire, doesn't deign to look at me and instead says, in a bored voice, "So you're the one." The other woman next to Rudy says, "I heard you're working on a novel about slaynar." I actually didn't hear what she said, so I say, "What's the book about?" Rudy says humorlessly, "It's about 300 pages." Still not looking at me.
I spent enough years bartending to recognize the manic depressive drinker, so I turn to the very nice man to my right and start talking about Supersize Me, the movie where Morgan Spurlock skinny dips in the filth that is McDonald's. Rudy grabs my arm and asks for a pen. I give him one, he writes something and throws the pen back at me without saying thank you. Rudy spends the rest of the night being ignored by authors more famous than him, so maybe I was just on the bottom of the feeding chain. Regardless, the next day I took his book, unread, and donated it along with a copy of May Day to the woman collecting books for a Hospice silent auction.
Also the next day, I got tax tips for writers and met with the Chicago librarians who had fantastic advice about researching and making connections with libraries. They were actually pretty funny, in a good way. My favorite was the one librarian who referred offhandedly to the banned books display, and how that's one of the most popular displays at her library. Look for a banned book display to appear in an upcoming Murder by Month Mystery. Love it.
And that's about it for Love Is Murder. I met some fantastic people and one ass and learned a great deal about creative writing and creative marketing. If you are a Chicago-area mystery writer and/or if you write thrillers, traditional, and hard-boiled mystery, I highly recommend you check out this scene next year. Whee.
Saturday
First, I got copies of my books to the bookseller, Sue Peterson. That way, I didn't have to deal with cash when working with the droves of people anxious for a hot off the presses copy of May Day (I actually did sign and sell three copies, which was fun after I got over the "what and where do I write?" dilemma). Then, I went to various panel presentations and met a wonderful woman named Eleonora, who is working on a mystery series involving birding. It sounded like it has a built-in audience and great potential. I also met a dolphin researcher named Kelly Jaakkola writing a science thriller involving dolphins. Smart chick. And I got William Kent Krueger to sign a copy of his standalone for my mom and David Morrell to sign a copy of Creepers for my dad. Both men were very nice and both are very good writers, though seriously, if you haven't read WKK's writing, get some now. He's off the charts good.
In the afternoon I went to a panel on writing sex (which is about all I'm doing with it lately), and Barry Eisler made funny points about how authors are uncomfortable writing about sex because we all think the reader is going to think we're writing about ourselves, and what if we're bad in bed? Shortly thereafter, I was on the first time authors panel, and I was nervous but met a nice guy named Marcus. And then one time, at band camp... oh wait, here's a picture of me at the first time author's panel with Morgan Mandel on my left and Sarah Wisseman on my right.
So that night, I'm sitting by chance at a dinner table with the luminaries of the conference--famous, famous writers. I don't know how it happened. Anyhow, on my left is one of the famous authors, who shall from now on be referred to as Rudy. I have never read Rudy's work, but coincidentally bought a copy of the first book in the series the day before (not Morrell or Krueger). I say to Rudy, "I just bought a copy of blah de blah. I'm excited to read it."
Rudy, who is hilarious in large groups but currently throwing back scotch like his ass is on fire, doesn't deign to look at me and instead says, in a bored voice, "So you're the one." The other woman next to Rudy says, "I heard you're working on a novel about slaynar." I actually didn't hear what she said, so I say, "What's the book about?" Rudy says humorlessly, "It's about 300 pages." Still not looking at me.
I spent enough years bartending to recognize the manic depressive drinker, so I turn to the very nice man to my right and start talking about Supersize Me, the movie where Morgan Spurlock skinny dips in the filth that is McDonald's. Rudy grabs my arm and asks for a pen. I give him one, he writes something and throws the pen back at me without saying thank you. Rudy spends the rest of the night being ignored by authors more famous than him, so maybe I was just on the bottom of the feeding chain. Regardless, the next day I took his book, unread, and donated it along with a copy of May Day to the woman collecting books for a Hospice silent auction.
Also the next day, I got tax tips for writers and met with the Chicago librarians who had fantastic advice about researching and making connections with libraries. They were actually pretty funny, in a good way. My favorite was the one librarian who referred offhandedly to the banned books display, and how that's one of the most popular displays at her library. Look for a banned book display to appear in an upcoming Murder by Month Mystery. Love it.
And that's about it for Love Is Murder. I met some fantastic people and one ass and learned a great deal about creative writing and creative marketing. If you are a Chicago-area mystery writer and/or if you write thrillers, traditional, and hard-boiled mystery, I highly recommend you check out this scene next year. Whee.
Sunday, February 05, 2006
Librarians Rule
That is how I would sum up Love Is Murder. But that's a cop out, putting the end at the beginning, so let me back up and share my itinerary (and thanks for not pointing out that I didn't actually post FROM the conference as promised, except for the one day, because I was too friggin' cheap to pay .69 cents a minute to use a hotel computer):
FRIDAY:
Mr. B. had me on a whirlwind meet and greet goodwill tour at Chicago area bookstores. A really hot guy at Barnes & Noble told me that corporate decided what they carried, but would I mind going out with him? Or maybe it was, "Corporate makes our buying decisions, and would you mind getting off of me?" It was hard to hear over the bustling of book readers. I got the same reaction at Borders (Mr. B. warned me) minus the hot guy, but they rejected me very nicely, too. They should teach dating classes.
The independent bookstore owners were fantastic. Auggie (spelling? I just visualized Auggie Doggie) at Centuries and Sleuths was encouraging even though he was having computer issues. His store was exactly as you'd imagine a cozy, independent, warm and welcoming bookstore to be. Brainsnacks had closed shop and moved to Sue Peterson's home and Something Wicked in Evanston was going out of business, but Sandmeier's in downtown Chicago took a copy of May Day, and I happily stumbled across Downer's Grove Anderson's Bookshop, where the gentleman working was kind, encouraging, and helpful. Again, yay for independent bookstores!
Anyhow, I got back and was exhausted but made it to supper at Love Is Murder, and boy am I glad I did! Met a guy whose parents had a cabin on Battle Lake (I told Mr. B., EVERYONE has heard of Battle Lake. It's weird that way and hence a perfect setting for a series) and heard David Morrell, of First Blood fame, give the keynote address. He gave a fascinating account of how the publishing industry has changed and gave useful marketing tips. I'd be doing a disservice to you (since you'd be better off going to a signing or presentation by Mr. Morrell because he's a great speaker) and to Mr. Morrell by stealing his examples, so I'll just sum up his main points using me as an example. If you're not considering a writing career, or furthering one you already have, you may find this stultifying, but I'll throw in swear words to keep you on your toes.
Get a Platform
When marketing your book to an agent, a publisher, or a potential reader, don't tell them about the plot or the characters. Tell them what your platform is. Basically, this means telling agents and publishers how you'd market the book and giving readers a sound bite to connect to the book with. Here's the platform for May Day:
"A romantically challenged twenty-something is pushed from being a cosmopolitan gal to a reluctant, small-town librarian where she has to solve a murder a month while learning to date in a shallow gene pool."
Nope. Don't like it. How about this:
Sex and the Country with murder.
Hmmm. But who do you market that to? Morrell made it look easy. Help me come up with a platform.
Get Things
When marketing your book, come up with a viral marketing campaign, one that is cheap but unique and creates buzz because of its uniqueness. I'm doing the standared book marks and postcards, but I've also got mood pens (signifying monthly moodiness), calendar magnets (murder by month--get it?), and I ordered t-shirts with the book cover on front and, "Battle Lake--easy to get to, hard to leave" on the back because you can't leave when you're dead!!! Ha ha snort. The t-shirts will be given away in free drawings at my book signings. I also recommend to new authors that you locate your county Arts Council and see what sort of grants they have available for promoting your work. I paid for 60% of my promotional items with a very generous grant from the Lake Region Arts Council.
Cross Your Fingers
There are a lot of great books out there. Write the best book you can, and hope the rest of the world finds it.
Phew. OK, I'm too tired tonight to write more. Watch for a Saturday and Sunday summary tomorrow, along with more writing and marketing tidbits as well as funny conference stories. Fucken A.
FRIDAY:
Mr. B. had me on a whirlwind meet and greet goodwill tour at Chicago area bookstores. A really hot guy at Barnes & Noble told me that corporate decided what they carried, but would I mind going out with him? Or maybe it was, "Corporate makes our buying decisions, and would you mind getting off of me?" It was hard to hear over the bustling of book readers. I got the same reaction at Borders (Mr. B. warned me) minus the hot guy, but they rejected me very nicely, too. They should teach dating classes.
The independent bookstore owners were fantastic. Auggie (spelling? I just visualized Auggie Doggie) at Centuries and Sleuths was encouraging even though he was having computer issues. His store was exactly as you'd imagine a cozy, independent, warm and welcoming bookstore to be. Brainsnacks had closed shop and moved to Sue Peterson's home and Something Wicked in Evanston was going out of business, but Sandmeier's in downtown Chicago took a copy of May Day, and I happily stumbled across Downer's Grove Anderson's Bookshop, where the gentleman working was kind, encouraging, and helpful. Again, yay for independent bookstores!
Anyhow, I got back and was exhausted but made it to supper at Love Is Murder, and boy am I glad I did! Met a guy whose parents had a cabin on Battle Lake (I told Mr. B., EVERYONE has heard of Battle Lake. It's weird that way and hence a perfect setting for a series) and heard David Morrell, of First Blood fame, give the keynote address. He gave a fascinating account of how the publishing industry has changed and gave useful marketing tips. I'd be doing a disservice to you (since you'd be better off going to a signing or presentation by Mr. Morrell because he's a great speaker) and to Mr. Morrell by stealing his examples, so I'll just sum up his main points using me as an example. If you're not considering a writing career, or furthering one you already have, you may find this stultifying, but I'll throw in swear words to keep you on your toes.
Get a Platform
When marketing your book to an agent, a publisher, or a potential reader, don't tell them about the plot or the characters. Tell them what your platform is. Basically, this means telling agents and publishers how you'd market the book and giving readers a sound bite to connect to the book with. Here's the platform for May Day:
"A romantically challenged twenty-something is pushed from being a cosmopolitan gal to a reluctant, small-town librarian where she has to solve a murder a month while learning to date in a shallow gene pool."
Nope. Don't like it. How about this:
Sex and the Country with murder.
Hmmm. But who do you market that to? Morrell made it look easy. Help me come up with a platform.
Get Things
When marketing your book, come up with a viral marketing campaign, one that is cheap but unique and creates buzz because of its uniqueness. I'm doing the standared book marks and postcards, but I've also got mood pens (signifying monthly moodiness), calendar magnets (murder by month--get it?), and I ordered t-shirts with the book cover on front and, "Battle Lake--easy to get to, hard to leave" on the back because you can't leave when you're dead!!! Ha ha snort. The t-shirts will be given away in free drawings at my book signings. I also recommend to new authors that you locate your county Arts Council and see what sort of grants they have available for promoting your work. I paid for 60% of my promotional items with a very generous grant from the Lake Region Arts Council.
Cross Your Fingers
There are a lot of great books out there. Write the best book you can, and hope the rest of the world finds it.
Phew. OK, I'm too tired tonight to write more. Watch for a Saturday and Sunday summary tomorrow, along with more writing and marketing tidbits as well as funny conference stories. Fucken A.
Friday, February 03, 2006
Airport Whore
I am in Chicago! The flight was quick and easy, despite the twitch in the guy next to me. It was like he was playing air piano to no music. Everyone in Chicago is as nice as I remember, from the shuttle guy to the train guy to the hotel lady. I have not yet seen any famous authors at the hotel, but I have my eyes peeled. You can pick authors out of the crowd because they walk around with sort of a vague smile. Anyhow, my friend Christine and I made it Second City Comedy Club last night, and the show was OK but the drinks were fabulous. I had a grasshopper. Remember those? Your grandparents would make them when they had to babysit you and tell you they were mint ice cream so drink up.
We had to take the L back to O'Hare to get our free shuttle back from Second City, and at the nearly empty airport, an old guy in a suit walked by Christine and me and said, "Need a hotel room?" and kept walking. Christine turned to me and said, "Oh! He must think we don't have a place to stay tonight and is offering us his room." To which I said, "Those are big dreams for an airport whore."
Did you have to be there? We were trying to look pretty and instead, apparently, looked like we accept credit cards, money orders, and cash. Anyhow, Mr. B. sent a great poster for my book signing on Saturday, my first, where I will be in the same room as William Kent Krueger and Judith Guest, among other luminaries! Check back here for really brief updates as the hotel computers are .69 a minute.
Bye!
p.s. I dropped a copy of May Day off at Alibi Books in Glenview, and the owner was supportive, wise (she likes William Kent Krueger!), and very nice. It's a great bookstore, so I recommend checking it out when you're in the area. They have a great kid's book selection in addition to the mysteries, so it's a fun family stop.
We had to take the L back to O'Hare to get our free shuttle back from Second City, and at the nearly empty airport, an old guy in a suit walked by Christine and me and said, "Need a hotel room?" and kept walking. Christine turned to me and said, "Oh! He must think we don't have a place to stay tonight and is offering us his room." To which I said, "Those are big dreams for an airport whore."
Did you have to be there? We were trying to look pretty and instead, apparently, looked like we accept credit cards, money orders, and cash. Anyhow, Mr. B. sent a great poster for my book signing on Saturday, my first, where I will be in the same room as William Kent Krueger and Judith Guest, among other luminaries! Check back here for really brief updates as the hotel computers are .69 a minute.
Bye!
p.s. I dropped a copy of May Day off at Alibi Books in Glenview, and the owner was supportive, wise (she likes William Kent Krueger!), and very nice. It's a great bookstore, so I recommend checking it out when you're in the area. They have a great kid's book selection in addition to the mysteries, so it's a fun family stop.
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